WIPE THE SLATE CLEAN!! SWEEP THE FLOOR! OPEN THE CURTAINS!!! RINSE THE MUGS!! We meet again without the heavy burdensome shadow of backlogged content looming over me for the past year! aaah where to begin?? how have you been? I genuinely want to know. Thanks for stopping by, it’s been a while hasn’t it? I’ve moved neighbourhoods last Nov and have been currently working on my growth in the teaching field since last Aug (and for professional reasons I’m not sharing as much of that as I would) (but just know that it’s been both dragging myself through the mud / feeling like I’m soaring).
In this video lies ahead scenes from february /2020/. Moments captured between hours where I was working from home. I drank coffee, reunited with friends, cooked a lot, tested my knife skills—which still, sit at the bottom of the mercury. These were scenes where it felt like i was rebuilding ease into my heart brick by brick. As a new/growing teacher, I’ve begun taking the hand that coffee has offered me. When accepted at a non-recommended hour, coffee is still disastrous to me. But it’s been nice knowing how to embed this common drink into my routines and sometimes it makes me feel dangerously confident. Baby steps.
there was a landslide amount of footage from 2019 that it overwhelmed me and ended up paralysing my motivation to create anything at all. Wing reminded me, in her own direct and indirect way, there is always time for these things later and ‘who would we be without backlogged footage’. It’s very much the way we are. We’ll always have backlogged footage stowed away underneath our floorboards, memories that have long passed but still remain. I’m beginning to learn how to say “I will get back to you later” as I dust my old clips on their respective shelves, whilst being okay with leaving them there (for now).
It’s a difficult time for everyone–with the virus added onto several weights we burden ourselves with during the start of the year. For this reason, we can easily use it as an excuse to dismiss our ability to get started on caring even more so about our own health/mind/brain/heart—even small actions like making breakfast or doing groceries. Prior to these scenes, I hadn’t properly seen people for weeks and felt incredibly lonely. It was scary to feel like this because I usually don’t mind being alone. These Feb scenes were after my friend Zoe offered to stop by with some spare masks. She stayed for an hour and I felt alight, charged, taken aback that even a small moment like that was helpful and wonderful in an immeasurable way. It was then that I decided I could somehow make more efforts to reach out to my friends instead of isolating myself. This video has a whole lot of my heart because my friends made frequent appearances. Take care of yourself, have your meals on time, try and wake before that double-digit on the clock (10:00) and revisit an old favourite book or film.
🌾orange cat from the snack shop